


Nutella Toast and Existential Numbness

by SapphicAndSarcastic



Series: The Life chronicles of Robin S [18]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Depressive Episode, M/M, Mental Illness, basically Jensen cant get out of bed and that's okay, fatigue, mental health, numb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-29 18:18:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11446392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SapphicAndSarcastic/pseuds/SapphicAndSarcastic
Summary: Jensen is having a lower day, in which he can't bring himself to get up. His husband ensures he is taken care of and safe





	Nutella Toast and Existential Numbness

**Author's Note:**

> Another not-so-uplifting story because I am in that kind of mood. Possibly triggering IDK

"Come on Sweetie, get up." Robin opened the blinds, exposing Jensen's face to the direct sunlight, expecting him to pull the covers over his head and grumble as usual. He stayed perfectly still, blinking slowly, but making no attempt to either shade eyes nor to move at all. "Honey, up up, you have to get dressed pretty soon." No response. Just a sad look before his eyes closed again. "Jensen?" Jensen sighed softly, seeming to exert an extreme amount of effort to curl into himself. Robin abandoned his shirt mid-attempt buttoning to make his way to his husband's side of the bed. He sat on the edge, gently prying Jensen's hands from his face and brushing the stray hairs off his cheek. "Today a bad day?" Jensen grunted in confirmation. Robin squeezed his hand and stood up. "Okay. I'll be right back, stay there." Jensen gave him a where-do-you-think-I'd-go squint and re-buried himself in blankets. 

Robin finished buttoning his work shirt as he made his way to the kitchen. Once there he put some bread in the toaster and then checked that he was out of the bedroom's line of sight. He sighed deeply and sagged against the kitchen counter, sinking down the cabinets to the floor, holding his face in his hands. He stayed on the floor until the toaster popped up. He took a deep breath and renewed his optimistic expression as he put the chocolate spread on Jensen's toast, pushing away his guilty thoughts while pouring the instant cocoa into a mug of steamy soy milk and finally grabbing Jensen a small glass of water to take his pills before placing it all on a tray and bringing it back into their room. 

Robin set the tray on the nightstand on Jensen's side of the bed before rousing him again. Jensen didn't make a fuss, more limp than resistant. Robin physically rearranged him in an upright position, placing the tray on his lap and holding his head up like a child. "Jenny, hon, eat something." Jensen looked blearily in his vague direction. Robin let out a breath of mild frustration. "Please, you get nauseous if you take your mess on an empty stomach." "can't." Robin blinked back at him. "You can't what?" Jensen just shook his head, an almost imperceptible movement. Robin took the toast from his plate, holding it to Jensen's mouth. Jensen looked at him blankly. "Eat." Jensen's shoulder's seemed to droop even more at the thought of eating. Robin leaned forward and firmly coaxed Jensen's jaw open, placing a small piece into his mouth, and then closing his jaw with his hand. Jensen chewed slowly, taking no gratification in his favorite breakfast food. Robin continued to hand feed him, alternating between toast and now luke-warm hot chocolate. 

Once Jensen had finished the typically simple task he leaned against Robin and closed his eyes. Robin readjusted himself to hold him more comfortably. Once re-settled against the many pillows, he traced the alphabet into Jensen's upper back and twirled his dark hair between his fingers, simply allowing him to exist at his own pace. Robin reached for his phone, fleetingly grateful the chargers were on this side of the bed, to text his classmate for notes. He also sent a brief notification to Jensen's doctor, letting her know that Jensen may need an appointment sooner than the scheduled two weeks.

Jensen appeared to have fallen asleep on Robin's chest. His breathing was even, eyes closed, entire body relaxed, but his lips moved in a silent count. Robin noticed he was awake, taking this opportunity to grab the three pills and the water from the nightstand. Jensen opened his eyes at the movement. He blinked at Robin, who reflected the expression. Jensen gently took the capsules from Robin's hand, swallowing them with a small sip from the glass. He paused, simply staring at Robin. Robin smiled softly, "what?" Another long pause. "Nine-hundred and eighty three" Robin tilted his head, frowning quizzically. "Nine-eighty three what?"   
"Heartbeats"  
"Oh, that's what you were doing"  
Jensen shrugged, snuggling back into Robin's lap. Robin leaned forward, placing a very gently kiss to his partner's cheek. 

"Are we getting up today?"  
"No"  
"Okay"  
Jensen gripped Robin's hand, squeezing it, hoping to convey his gratitude through the gesture. Robin tipped Jensen's head back slightly, mirroring Jensen's exhausted eyes but forcing his mouth to smile. Jensen mustered up enough energy to return Robin's kiss before closing his eyes again, accepting the defeat of existence for today.


End file.
